fic: Merry Misunderstanding 3/?

Fic: Merry Misunderstanding 3/?
by Max

Disclaimer: I don’t own Gundam Wing

There is a comic version of this same stretch of story:  http://www.faithinthemoon.com/2014/12/comic-merry-misunderstanding-3.html



Duo believed in the multiverse. He did. That’s how he was able to be on stage with Relena, wrapping his arms around her as the bomb went off, arching his back, covering her with all his will and trusting Heero to be in the best possible position. As the sound echoed over him he was also in a Sweeper hanger bay, half the size he was now, clinging to the cockpit of a salvaged mech, whose weapons had just blown a hole in the side of the bay. Another fragment of the multiverse had him in a trench with Quatre, a detonator in each hand, the percussion of bombs ripping across the hard rock ground, grinning, knowing death was likely imminent, but wanting to take fuckers with him, and then they were falling and it was Relena in his arms, not Quatre, not Heero. Shock waves from bombs past hit his back as if they were there in that present moment and he held her tighter, shielding her head from the debris he expected any second.

He’d long since stopped believing there was anyone listening to his prayers, but old rituals pulled and he held Heero’s name bright in his thoughts, wishing safety and protection on him.

When they hit, they landed on Duo’s feet, the impact drove him down to his knees and he rolled, taking the remaining impact on his chest, cushioning her as much as he could before, rolling them to protect her from any falling debris, shrapnel. She was peace. She was children being feed. She was families not dying. She was.. maybe... the one that Heero loved and wanted to be with, and if that was what he could give to Heero, dying doing it would be best.

Her hands planted on his chest, shoving hard.. an action he hadn’t expected or steeled against and he rolled back, landing on his ass, ears ringing from his trip through the multiverse and the landing. The space they were in was lit, so the electric was still on. There wasn’t much in the air for smoke or blood and Duo’s head spun. He sat there on his ass, tux jacket slipping down his arms, tie undone, one collar point completely unfolded and brushing his cheek, as he stared up at her...

... and she brushed off her arms, cute little nose wrinkled and lifted. “I feel so bruised! Did you have to hold on so hard? I know falling is scary, but seriously! I thought you were braver than that!”

Duo’s mouth dropped open, head tilted just slightly. “There. Was. A. Bomb. Relena... a bomb went off at the party. You know... fucking, bang, bang, splody.. body parts everywhere. I tried real hard to keep you from hitting your head.”

Elegant fingers tucked hair back into her updo and she stared down her nose at him, her lips pursing just a little. “Don’t be silly. It was all just smoke.”

Duo’s jaw dropped all the way to his gut. This was a part of the multiverse that he’d never been to before.  “You... Relena Darlian... got all sorta folk together for a Christmas party so you could set off a SMOKE bomb.. and abduct me?  Are you gonna try to kill me?  Cuz that’s gonna be unpleasant.”

“No, no, well, yes, but no, I have no intention of harming you, Maxwell. I just need your help!” She batted her hand at him as if explaining that she’d just borrowed his coat for a moment, after all, no big deal.

Head spinning less, he shifted up to where he was kneeling. Suspicious of her, he started at her with narrowed eyes. “Okay....”

“It’s for Heero,” she said while smiling like sunshine.

Duo knelt there, staring up at her, not quite sure enough of his body to stand up yet, lips pursed, violet eyes staring.  “Go on.”

“So Zechs came into possession of a safety deposit box that had belonged to Khushrenada. It has the only copy of Heero’s actual birth certificate. His birth name, the means to find his family. I need you to get it for me.” She smiled sweetly. “I have arranged for tools for you, tools of your trade, after all.”

Hate is like a little black sugar cube and it feels like you can lick that sweetness forever and it’ll never go away.  “You abducted me, in front of every world leader, so I could rob a bank for you?”

“Yes,” she said, picking up her skirt and moving towards a stack of boxes. “Everything you’ll need should be here.”

Duo stood up, head tilting, vision going white, mouth twitching. What he really wanted was a hammer. He could feel it in his hand, feel it impacting the back of her head, feeling hard give way to soft felt so satisfying.... “Relena! Are you insane? Are you fucking insane?” His hands made expressive gestures as he spoke, voice rising steadily as he went. “I’m going to go to prison for this! They’re going to think I abducted you! They’re going to blame me for the bomb! That’s terrorism, you stupid, irresponsible.....” his hands covered his face for a moment as he looked for the right insult, “politician!”
She turned, the light glittering in her dangling diamond earrings and from her pretty white teeth. She held up both hands waving them dismissively. “Now now. Calm down! I’ve arranged with Judge Murray for no more than six months more probation for you. It was all at terribly out of hand prank and you’ll cooperate fully. You’re very contrite.”

“Like fucking hell I am! I’m not contrite! I don’t need no viagra and what’s that got to do with it?”

Relena’s mouth dropped open, blue eyes confused. “What? What did you think I meant?”

His face contorted, arms across his chest.  “I ain’t gonna get no more probation! I want to be with Heero.”

“I know he’s your friend. He’s very important to you,” she said, hedging, wanting his agreement to that. “But I want him to accept who he is, know his family, have a family of his own, be a respectable member of the world community.”

Duo tipped his head back, that black sugar cube dissipating into his blood like it was him, always him that was that toxic in the first place.  “Not like some fucking felon with shady skills and homicidal urges?”

“Heero’s nothing like that,” she said, lifting her chin challengingly. “He’s going to keep the peace and bring humanity to new levels of well being.”

“Yeah. Heero could do that,” Duo agreed, committing to do what she asked in him mind. Heero deserved the best chances.

<><>

Chang Wufei was the Chinese Imperial Emperor. He smiled politely to the seemingly very nice woman who was the President of the People’s Republic of China. Until that evening, he’d never imagined wanting to sit at the same table as say Councilman from the Reggae World Republic. Wufei smiled at her. She smiled back.

And then Duo Maxwell saved him by taking all the attention of the world as he screamed out some classic song about lying love interests, in a pretty good voice and style, Wufei thought. Then he noticed Yuy sitting there politely at a front row table with Relena.. and reeled back through his memories... of watching them walk together, her on his arm. It was like a puzzle piece shoved into the wrong position. Yuy was supposed to be leaning closer to listen to Maxwell.  Maxwell was angry about Yuy cheating on him with President Darlian. Wufei’s mind lost all semblance of imperial dignity.

And that was before Relena lost her dignity. She was on stage, slapping Maxwell upside the head, her $10,000 evening gown hiked up as she attempted to kick Yuy’s lover in the nuts, and he was holding her at bay, no punching, just smacking back, this look on his face that Wufei wasn’t sure that he hadn’t seen on a baboon before. People were just... people.  He turned to the practical woman sitting next to him, smiled. “I would like to reopen negotiations on trade.”

She smiled back. “Excellent. I feel we can be very valuable to each other.”

“I’m sure we can be,” he said, feeling contented with the world. And then a loud flash bang went off and filled the space with pretty colored smoke.  Wufei sipped his tea.

Everyone who wasn’t him or Yuy seemed to be running and screaming. Tables flew. Dishes clattered. There was sobbing. Wufei sipped more tea, watched Heero not respond at all, not even moving as some man scrambled across his table and Maxwell and Darlian disappeared down a suddenly open trap door. Wufei made a disapproving tsk’ing sound. Someone was going to be in deep, deep shit for drugging Heero Yuy.

President Ming stared at him, her heart beating a frantic pulse in her throat, but she followed his lead and picked up her tea to sip.

Finally, he stood, hands in his sleeves and said in the most elegant and formal traditions, “We do not fear pink colored smoke. Be calm.”

No one paid him the slightest head. Sirens screamed. Some woman wailed seriously and Wufei suspected a broken bone preceded that sound. He cleared his throat to try again, but Ming held up her hand, climbed up on the table and screamed in the most common of American subdialects, “Sit’er fucking asses down! It was just a smoke bomb!”

The room calmed... and the boil tipped in a different direction. Fear turned to embarrassment. Embarrassment turned to ire. Ire turned to lust for vengeance.

“Where’s Maxwell,” someone screamed and then the concept of Duo Maxwell became the heat that boiled the pot.

It was only moments before the first of the reporter types was up next to Wufei. “How quickly did you suspect that Duo Maxwell was behind the abduction of President Darlian? Did someone diffuse the real bomb?”

One nice thing about being emperor was that it wasn’t really murder if he felt it was in the best interest of his people. That thought might have reflected in his smile. “Would you like to continue slandering an Imperial friend?”

Ming stepped up next to him, her smile pure party and method. “We have excellent skills at controlling the media. May I?”

Wufei smiled. This really did have potential. “We are happy to observe your great skills.”

<><>

Martha had expected them home before dawn, but snuggling in bed with Mary and Allen, she was happy to read the headlines about how the Christmas party was spectacular and glittering, pulled off without a single hitch. The photos were lovely.



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